


Class 1-A and Other Potentially Dangerous Cryptids

by RagDoll_Physics



Category: SCP Foundation, 僕のヒーローアカデミア | Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia
Genre: @ all iida and tsuyu stans: i'm sorry, Aizawa Shouta | Eraserhead Adopts Shinsou Hitoshi, Aizawa Shouta | Eraserhead is So Done, Character Bashing, Chatting & Messaging, Crack Treated Somewhat Seriously, Dialogue Heavy, Established Relationship, F/F, F/M, Gen, Hakamata Tsunagu | Best Jeanist Lives, Kaminari Denki Needs a Hug, Kaminari Denki is a Good Friend, Kirishima Eijirou is a Good Friend, M/M, Midoriya Izuku is a Good Friend, On Hiatus, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Other Ships Not Mentioned in Tags, Sasaki Mirai | Sir Nighteye Lives, Sero Hanta is a Good Friend, Shinsou Hitoshi Replaces Mineta Minoru, Shinsou Hitoshi is a Good Friend, Shinsou Hitoshi is a Little Shit, Shinsou Hitoshi is in Class 1-A, Sir Nighteye Bashing, Uraraka Ochako is a Good Friend, and befriending almost all of them, but only so i can make him a bitch, but that comes later in the story, everyone is probably ooc but i tried, i made them so rude, kaminari and 999 are soon to be bffs, kids be finding cryptids, pacing? never heard of her
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-18
Updated: 2020-06-30
Packaged: 2021-03-04 01:00:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 9,558
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24795049
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RagDoll_Physics/pseuds/RagDoll_Physics
Summary: *Iida Tenya has created a new chat.**Iida Tenya has named the chat Class 1-A.**Iida Tenya has added Midoriya Izuku, Uraraka Ochako, and 18 others to Class 1-A.*Iida Tenya: Hello everybody! Aizawa Sensei has asked me to create a class group chat in case of emergencies and we're not close to each other!Aizawa Shouta: Don’t @ me unless it’s an emergency.*Aizawa Shouta is offline!*Kaminari Denki: LMFAOOOOOSero Hanta: LMFAOOOOOJirou Kyoka: Please don’t.*Kaminari Denki has changed their name to Pikachu.**Pikachu has changed Midoriya Izuku’s name to Bone Machine Broke.*Bone Machine Broke: That’s fair.---Another bnha chatfic but kaminari starts a cryptid hunter group because almost nobody believes him or Shinsou when they say that there are things outside the dorms at night. [ON HIATUS]
Relationships: Asui Tsuyu/Uraraka Ochako, Bakugou Katsuki/Kirishima Eijirou, Iida Tenya/Sero Hanta, Kaminari Denki/Shinsou Hitoshi, Midoriya Inko/Yagi Toshinori | All Might, Midoriya Izuku/Todoroki Shouto
Comments: 35
Kudos: 339





	1. *Iida Tenya has created a new chat.*

**Author's Note:**

> Uh things you need to know! This fic takes place about a month before the s4 internships (and we're gonna be time-skipping just a bit in this fic), and Shinsou took Mineta's place after he was expelled a month after the dorms were built for groping mina and momo in the girls' showers. Also I haven't read the manga nor have I watched s4 in months, please just roll with all of the bs I put in this fic and have a good day. The actual plot will start next chap.

***Iida Tenya has created a new chat.***

***Iida Tenya has named the chat Class 1-A.***

***Iida Tenya has added Midoriya Izuku, Uraraka Ochako, and 18 others to Class 1-A.***

**Iida Tenya** : Hello everybody! Aizawa Sensei has asked me to create a class group chat in case of emergencies!

**Aizawa Shouta** : Don’t @ me unless it’s an emergency.

***Aizawa Shouta is offline!***

**Kaminari Denki** : LMFAOOOOO

**Sero Hanta** : LMFAOOOOO

**Jirou Kyoka** : Please don’t.

***Kaminari Denki has changed their name to Pikachu.***

***Pikachu has changed Midoriya Izuku’s name to Bone Machine Broke.***

**Bone Machine Broke** : That’s fair.

***Pikachu has changed Sero Hanta’s name to Spiderman.***

***Pikachu has changed Uraraka Ochaco’s name to Space Girl.***

***Pikachu has changed Ashido Mina’s name to On wednesdays we wear pink.***

**On wednesdays we wear pink** : I have to admit that one’s pretty clever.

***Pikachu has changed Bakugou Katsuki’s name to Lord Explosion Murder.***

***Pikachu has changed Iida Tenya’s name to Sanic.***

**Sanic** : I believe you misspelled my name. Please change it back.

**Pikachu** : lol no.

***Pikachu has changed Asui Tsuyu’s name to Ribbit.***

**Ribbit** : i like it, kero.

***Pikachu has changed Kirishima Eijirou’s name to Hard 24/7.***

**Hard 24/7** : NICE!

***Pikachu has changed Jirou Kyoka’s name to Beats by Dre.***

**Beats by Dre** : Not completely hateable.

***Pikachu has changed Todoroki Shouto’s name to Katy Perry.***

**Katy Perry** : ???

***Pikachu has changed Hagakure Tooru’s name to John Cena.***

**John Cena** : YOU CAN’T SEE ME!

***Pikachu has changed Aoyama Yuuga’s name to And I shine like gloss.***

**And I shine like gloss** : Parfait~!

***Pikachu has changed Ojiro Mashirao’s name to Tails.***

**Tails** : Not as bad as I thought it would be.

***Pikachu has changed Tokoyami Fumikage’s name to Revelry in the Dark.***

**Revelry in the Dark** : revelry in the dark.

***Pikachu has changed Yaoyorozu Momo’s name to Class Mom.***

***Pikachu has changed Shinsou Hitoshi’s name to Insert sleeping noises here.***

***Pikachu has changed Kouji Koda’s name to Snow White.***

**Snow White:** 👍👍👍!

**Insert sleeping noises here** : lmao ok

***Pikachu has changed Sato Rikido’s name to Mary Berry.***

**Mary Berry** : Who tf is that?

**Pikachu** : An old lady who loves baking! I need to show you the shows she’s in!!

 **Pikachu** : I’ll show you later!!!

**Mary Berry** : I don’t know if I should be afraid or not.

**Hard 24/7** : I actually know what Denks is talkin about for once, it’s actually really nice! Sometimes we stay up watching that one British show I forgot the name of lol

 **Hard 24/7** : We’re in the middle of season 3 atm

***Pikachu has changed Shouji Mezo’s name to Limbs.***

***Pikachu has changed Aizawa Shouta’s name to Dadzawa.***

**Bone Machine Broke** : and i oop-

**Dadzawa** : Kaminari.

**Pikachu** : GOTTA BLAST!!!

***Pikachu is offline!***

**Spiderman** : hol up mido you know that meme??

**Bone Machine Broke** : Yes???

**Hard 24/7** : shooketh

**Bone Machine Broke** : why is that weird??

 **Bone Machine Broke** : i’m not tenya or sho? I know the internet???

**On wednesdays we wear pink** : oh so yall on first-name basis now ok-

**Space Girl** : The whole squad’s on first-name basis lmao quit trying to start something

**Spiderman** : She snapped-

**Beats by Dre** : mina istg you ship everybody in class with each other its insane.

**On wednesdays we wear pink** : Plz stop exposing me.

 **On wednesdays we wear pink** : And if you’re gonna call me out for that call Tooru out for it too

**John Cena** : don’t drag me into this i’m busy with mashi rn

**Ribbit** : Are you having fun, kero?

**John Cena** : Yes!!

**Pikachu** : I wish I had me a mans like Ojiro.

**Hard 24/7** : mood

**And i shine like gloss** : mood~

**Bone Machine Broke** : mood

**Spiderman** : mood

**Insert sleeping noises here** : mood

**Beats by Dre** : imagine being single

**Pikachu** : NOT EVERYONE CAN BE IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD HERSELF JIROU

 **Pikachu** : and also i have detention now-

**Beats by Dre** : we don’t care.

**Bone Machine Broke** : please just let us yearn in peace.

**Space Girl** : imagine liking me-

 **Space Girl** : me-

 **Space Girl** : liking m-

 **Space Girl** : can’t even say it.

**Beats by Dre** : men are??? so gross?? how could you like them?? Have you seen the guys in this class????

**Class Mom** : You’ve forgotten that I’m bisexual, Kyo.

**Beats by Dre** : AKJASDA I’M SO SORRY MOMO YOURE SO VALID

**Space Girl** : YOU COME INTO OUR GC

 **Space Girl** : DISRESPECT GOD

**Beats by Dre** : PLEASE FORGIVE ME BBY

**Class Mom** : It’s okay, Kyo.

**Space Girl** : you’re off the hook

 **Space Girl** : for now

**Ribbit** : you’re cute when you’re aggressive, kero <3

**Space Girl** : TSU WRONG CHAT-

***Ribbit is offline!***

**Hard 24/7** : HOLD ON-

**Bone Machine Broke** : LMFAOOO

**Space Girl** : SHUT

**And i shine like gloss** : congrats! May you two shine like the stars!~

**Space Girl** : adakhddfj ty!!!

**Katy Perry** : i’m surprised it took you all that long to notice.

**On wednesdays we wear pink** : todoroki beat me to it lmao

 **On wednesdays we wear pink** : they’ve been together for the past week and they’re not very private about it tbh

**John Cena** : Hold on who are all the couples in class? Just to keep track.

 **John Cena** : and also if you’re comfortable with it, ofc!!!

 **John Cena** : there’s me and mashi, momo and jirou, and ura and tsu so far.

**Hard 24/7** : and me and Kat!!

**Pikachu** : WHAT

 **Spiderman** : WHAT

 **On wednesdays we wear pink** : WHAT

**Lord Explosion Murder** : EI

 **Lord Explosion Murder** : I’LL KILL YOU

 **Lord Explosion Murder** : I WANTED TO SAY IT

**Hard 24/7** : sorry babe

**Sanic** : we appreciate you two being brave enough to tell us!

**Lord Explosion Murder** : STFU FOUR EYES

**Hard 24/7** : Translation- thanks for accepting us!

**Mary Berry** : if you guys are done being gay dinner’s ready.

**Spiderman** : what’d you make man?

**Mary Berry** : Curry

 **Mary Berry** : I made vegan curry for you and Jirou

**Beats by Dre** : ‘Preciate it

**Spiderman** : Thank you!!!

**Mary Berry** : np!

***Everyone is offline!***


	2. Cryptid Hunters

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Woo let's get this ball rolling.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Class 1-A  
> -  
> Midoriya- Bone Machine Broke  
> Uraraka- Space Girl  
> Tsuyu- Ribbit  
> Bakugou- Lord Explosion Murder  
> Kirishima- Hard 24/7  
> Iida- Sanic  
> Kaminari- Pikachu  
> Sero- Spiderman  
> Mina- On Wednesdays we wear pink  
> Jiro- Beats by Dre  
> Todoroki- Katy Perry  
> Hagakure- John Cena  
> Tokoyami- Revelry in the Dark  
> Momo- Mom  
> Yuga- And I shine like gloss  
> Ojiro- Tails  
> Koji- Snow White  
> Sato- Mary Berry  
> Shoji- Limbs  
> Shinsou- Insert sleeping noises here  
> Aizawa- Dadzawa  
> -  
> Cryptid Hunters  
> -  
> Midoriya- Commander  
> Shinsou- Cover Up  
> Kaminari- Recorder  
> Sero- Rescue  
> Uraraka- 2nd in Command

_**Class 1-A 2:26 AM** _

**Pikachu** : DID YALL HEAR THAT???

 **Pikachu** : JESUS CHRIST

**Insert sleeping noises here** : snooorrrrreee mimimimimi

**Pikachu** : SHINSOU I’M SEROIS

 **Pikachu** : NO LIK E I HEARD SOMETHING OUTSIDE THE DORMS

 **Pikachu** : ITS SOUNDS SO GROSS EWWWW

**Insert sleeping noises here** : sorry can’t hear whatever you’re hearing over the sound of these cat videos

 **Insert sleeping noises here** : stfu and watch your old lady shows or whatever you watch

 **Insert sleeping noises here** : YOOO WTF WTF WTF

 **Insert sleeping noises here** : WHAT IS THAT

**Pikachu** : I TOLD YOU

**Insert sleeping noises here** : _@Dadzawa_ THRE’S SOMETGHIN OUTSDIE

**Dadzawa** : both of you make sure everything is closed and locked and stay where you are.

**Insert sleeping noises here** : IT’S GURGLING WHAT IS THAT

**Pikachu** : ITS OYN MY BALCONTY ITD OY MRY BALCONY HELP

**Dadzawa** : I’m on my way Kaminari. What does it look like?

**Pikachu** : IDFK ITS JUST AN ORNGE BLOB

 **Pikachu** : LIKE THE SIZE OF PRINCIPL NEZU MYBE A BIT BIGGER

 **Pikachu** : OOOOHOH O ITS TRYIG TO GEY IN IM GONE

 **Pikachu** : SHINSIU LET M IN PLASE

**Insert sleeping noises here** : yeah kaminari’s in my room now and we locked the door.

**Pikachu** : I’M SCARED

**Dadzawa** : Nobody’s there.

**Pikachu** : WHAT DO YOU MEAN NOBODY’S THERE??? IT WAS STILL TRYING TO GET IN WHEN I LEFT????

**Dadzawa** : There is a dirty orange blanket laying on the balcony. You have detention for the rest of the week and extra training.

**Pikachu** : YOU TRIPPIN I STG SOMETHING WAS THERE

 **Pikachu** : SHINSOU HEARD IT TOO

**Insert sleeping noises here** : YEAH SOMETHING WAS OUT THERE

 **Insert sleeping noises here** : SOMETHING THAT WAS ALIVE AND TRYING TO GET IN THE DORMS

**Dadzawa** : Fine, we will patrol the area later and if we can’t find anything i will not hesitate to severely punish you both for this.

 **Dadzawa** : now go to bed

***Dadzawa is offline!***

***Pikachu is offline!***

***Insert sleeping noises here is offline!***

_**Class 1-A 3:37 PM** _

**Hard 24/7** : LMFAO KAMI SHINSOU WTF HAPPENED TO YALL

**On wednesdays we wear pink** : RIGHT

**Pikachu** : I PROMISE YOU GUYS SOMETHING WAS OUTSIDE TRYING TO GET IN

 **Pikachu** : _@Insert sleeping noises here_ TELL THEM

**Insert Sleeping noises here** : I can back him up something was absolutely out there

**Ribbit** : Are you two sure it wasn’t just the sleep deprivation getting to you, kero?

**Insert sleeping noises here** : YES WE’RE SURE

**Sanic** : Do you honestly expect us to believe that two of the biggest pranksters in class just happened to be the only ones hearing something outside?

**Beats by Dre** : lmao right

**John Cena** : that’s what i told them during class!!

**Bone Machine Broke** : Guys i think we should at least give them the benefit of the doubt

**Lord Explosion Murder** : stfu deku you always have to hear the other side of the story

 **Lord Explosion Murder** : instead of just accepting the facts in front of you

 **Lord Explosion Murder** : the facts being that sparky and mind control are 5 seconds away from getting blown to bits

**On wednesdays we wear pink** : I love how Kirishima tamed the beast he’s not even yelling in the chat

**Hard 24/7** : I’ve worked hard

**Lord Explosion Murder** : I’LL KILL YOU

**On wednesdays we wear pink** : Gotta blast-

**Insert sleeping noises here** : anyways screw everybody else here i respect MIDORIYA

**Pikachu** : THANK YOU MIDORIYA

**Space Girl** : yeah I believe them too! They seemed way too upset for it to be a prank

**Spiderman** : right!!

 **Spiderman** : like,, when was the last time any of us have seen denki or shinsou that shaken up?

**Tails** : We’ve seen that their acting is good enough for it.

**Mom** : This is reminding me of the boy who cried wolf.

**Insert sleeping noises here** : but WHEN have we joked about villains knocking at 2 am???

 **Insert sleeping noises here** : yall wack asf

**Ribbit** : just admit that you two tried to prank us, kero

**Hard 24/7** : or that some kid’s lost blanket somehow ended up at your balcony and freaked you out.

**Insert sleeping noises here** : I hate all of you

**Pikachu** : THERE WAS SOMEONE OR SOMETHING OUTSIDE

 **Pikachu** : I HEARD IT COO AT ME

**Dadzawa** : End the discussion. It was a false alarm made by Kaminari and Shinsou who got scared after a blanket flew by the dorms. I expected better from you two before making the call but due to my powers being limited after Mineta’s expulsion, you two will only serve detention for the rest of the week along with extra training.

**Pikachu** : SENSEI THAT WAS NOT A FALSE ALARM

**Dadzawa** : End of discussion.

***Dadzawa is offline!***

**Pikachu** : Ugh! Fine then!!

\---

***Kaminari Denki has created a new chat.***

***Kaminari Denki has named the chat Cryptid Hunters.***

***Kaminari Denki has added Shinsou Hitoshi, Midoriya Izuku, and 2 others.***

**Kaminari Denki** : Y’all are the only people I trust rn

**Midoriya Izuku** : yeah well i don’t trust the chat name.

**Kaminari Denki** : It’s kinda self-explanatory.

 **Kaminari Denki** : Were going on a stakeout bois

 **Kaminari Denki** : and gorl

**Uraraka Ochaco** : Thank you.

**Midoriya Izuku** : Idk about this guys. I dont wanna get in trouble.

**Shinsou Hitoshi** : Kami why did you add the goody two shoes

**Midoriya Izuku** : :(

**Kaminari Denki** : Because out of all of us he has the most braincells!

 **Kaminari Denki:** which reminds me!

***Kaminari Denki has changed their name to Recorder.***

***Recorder has changed MIdoriya Izuku’s name to Commander.***

**Commander** : I DON’T LIKE THE IMPLICATIONS OF THIS AT ALL

***Recorder has changed Shinsou Hitoshi’s name to Cover Up.***

**Cover up** : explain???

***Recorder has changed Sero Hanta’s name to Rescue.***

**Rescue** : EXPLAIN???

***Recorder has changed Uraraka Ochaco’s name to 2nd in Command.***

**2nd in Command** : Aw yeah

**Recorder** : I’m glad somebody appreciates me around here.

 **Recorder** : So here’s the plan:

**Rescue** : oh here we go jfc

**Recorder** : anyways-

 **Recorder** : we’re gonna catch the thing that played peekaboo with me and shinsou last night!

 **Recorder** : And our names are the roles we’re gonna play!

 **Recorder** : Midoriya and Uraraka have more braincells than the rest of us, so they’re mostly in charge of coming up with a plan!

 **Recorder** : I’m gonna be recording stuff so even if we don’t beat whatever it is we actually have evidence that something’s out there.

 **Recorder** : Hanta is for if we can’t fight it off and need to retreat fast because he go swing real fast

 **Recorder** : and Shinsou is the one giving good excuses for what we’re doing if we get caught.

**Cover Up** : I feel so useful.

**Rescue** : i love larping!

**Recorder** : Np broski!

 **Recorder** : And Hanta!!! stfu!!!

 **Recorder** : Any questions?

**Rescue** : :(

**Commander** : I’m having crippling anxiety about this.

 **Commander** : like ofc i believe you and shinsou when you say that something is out there

 **Commander** : But what if we just go straight to Principal Nezu or someone if it happens again? And let them handle it.

**Recorder** : You saw mr aizawa today. I doubt we could do much of anything without him noticing it.

**Commander** : right, sorry

**Cover Up** : Don’t be sorry bro.

**Recorder** : Yeah if you really don’t wanna do it you can back out. I don’t want to force you into doing something you really don’t wanna do.

 **Recorder** : Just don’t tell anyone what we’re doing

**Commander** : I won’t! And I’m gonna do it, I just wanna ask you two some more questions.

**2nd in Command** : dear god i can hear him muttering from here

**Commander** : You said it was just a huge blob outside. Do either of you remember anything else about it? What color it was, how huge, anything?

**Cover Up** : I didn’t see anything, I just heard it and kami freaking tf out.

**Recorder** : shhhh

 **Recorder** : Uhhh i think it was orange? Maybe yellow?? I only saw a little bit of it because i ran out of my room.

 **Recorder** : and it was cooing at me like it wanted me to go near it.

 **Recorder** : i’m thinking extra hard rn gimme a second.

**Commander** : Take your time.

**Recorder** : oh you’re such a gentleman mido.

 **Recorder** : OH! It looked like peanut butter!!

**Rescue** : A huge orange glob of peanut butter tried to kill denki and shinsou last night oh my god guys-

**Recorder** : HUSH IT WAS ABOUT THE SIZE OF NEZU

**Cover Up** : WHAT

**Commander** : COME AGAIN???

**Recorder** : YEAH YALL AIN’T READ THE 2 AM CHAT???

**2nd in Command** : YIKES!!!

**2nd in Command** : Sorry to distract from how big this slime thing is, but I have an extra notebook in my room if you want to keep this separate from your hero notes deku!!

**Commander** : thanks ocha!

**Cover Up** : Aw that’s cute

**2nd in Command** : I HAVE A GF SHINSOU

**Cover Up** : call me hitoshi

 **Cover Up** : only if you want to ofc

**2nd in Command** : I HAVE A GF HITO

**Cover Up** : better

**Rescue** : Distractions aside, when and where are we gonna do this stakeout?

**Commander** : Is tonight good? We could stage it like a sleepover and stay in Kaminari’s room, since that’s where the blob was last time.

**Recorder** : YEAH STAKEOUT SLEEPOVER IN MY ROOM!!!

**2nd in Command** : We could start getting ready at 8:30 ish? And come in for the night whenever you guys feel like it.

**Commander** : Is that good with everyone?

**2nd in Command** : Wherever you go, I will follow, Commander.

**Cover up** : Sure

**Rescue** : if we die i want my meme collection to go to Mina.

**Recorder** : Alright, Operation: Peanut Butter is a go!

**Rescue** : denki please call it something else.

**Recorder** : No! Operation: Peanut Butter is a go!!


	3. Operation: Peanut Butter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hahahahahaha can you tell I haven't written since December,,,,,  
> Thank you guys for your support on the last chapters! You all made my day, and if you guys have any other scps or cryptids I could have the cryptid hunters find, please leave your suggestions in the comments!  
> I didn't know how to end the chapter i'm sorry-  
> EDIT: OOPS I KEPT MESSING UP HIS SIZE 999 IS 2 METERS W I D E NOT 2 METERS T A L L-

_**Kaminari's dorm room 2:28 AM** _

It hadn’t been very long into their stakeout when they turned it into an actual sleepover, the night filled with memes and Kaminari’s homemade vine compilations. Most of the group was asleep, tangled between all of the blankets and pillows that were scattered on the floor. Shinsou was scrolling through cat memes on his phone with tired eyes, slowly starting to drift off when he heard a tiny squelch coming from outside. It was barely audible, but he could hear the noises of something, clearly the same something from the night before, trailing across the outside walls. Shinsou's eyes were wide open as he shook everyone awake.

"Hey! Wake up, _wake up!_ " He whisper-shouted as he woke the electric boy next to him, the other three waking soon after. "The thing's here again!"

"Huh?" Kaminari blinked a couple times before shooting up and grabbing his phone, opening the camera.

Once the 5 teens were wide awake, they piped down, fear and curiosity running through them as the noises came closer. They could now hear cooing noises, and soon enough, there was a blobby silhouette outside of Kaminari's curtains. As the electric boy claimed, it was as big as Nezu, maybe bigger, the size of it sending chills down their spines.

"What do we do?!"

"Oh my god, what is that thing?!"

"I'm bouta head out."

"It's so _big!_ "

"Midoriya, _what are you doing?!_ "

The boy was crawling on his hands and knees towards the curtain, swallowing his fear as he reached for the curtain. Midoriya grabbed the curtain and pulled it back to reveal the creature as he backed up towards his group. It was a huge pile of orange slime, with large round black eyes looking over the group before cooing again, wanting to be let in. It didn't seem very aggressive at all, only wanting into the dorm. The teens all looked at each other before looking at the large thing in front of them with wide eyes.

"Well, what do we do now?" Shinsou asked. "We were right, now what?"

"We should go to Aizawa." Uraraka headed for the door, being stopped by her best friend. "Deku! We gotta get Mr. Aizawa!"

"Look at it, guys," He said cautiously. "It doesn't look like it wants to hurt us."

The blob seemed to hear the green boy's words and recoiled. Why would I want to hurt you? I want to help!

"I...should we let it in?" Shinsou asked after a moment.

" _No_ , don't let it in, you idiot!" Sero popped Shinsou in the back of the head. "Are you _crazy?!_ "

The slime made a noise that got everyone's attention. It was now tapping at the balcony door like a dog wanting to go back inside its owner's house, whimpering because why would I wanna hurt you? That's not what I do at all! After a moment, Kaminari stood up and cautiously moved towards the balcony door. He waved to the creature, the creature enthusiastically waving back. Denki opened the door, and the creature stood there for a moment before inching closer inside.

"Don't worry, we're not gonna hurt you," Kaminari tried, slowly backing away to give the creature space.

Once the creature had come inside completely, it looked up at Kaminari before rushing to him, hugging his legs as it let out high-pitched cooing noises. Kaminari began to smile at it, suddenly feeling very happy.

"Y’know, it's actually kind of cute," He snickered.

The slime looked at everyone before moving towards them, Denki right behind it. The slime waved and made a garbled noise that sounded vaguely like a hello. It went towards Shinsou first, the purple-haired teen backing away before staring at the slime hugging him. It did the same towards the other three, all of them lightening up and feeling _unnaturally_ happy. It spotted Izuku looking at it for seconds at a time before writing in his notebook. What are you doing? Are you writing about me? Let me see!

It walked (slid?) over to the freckled boy to look at what he was writing. I was right, he is writing about me! Wow, you're really good at drawing! But you could maybe fix this a bit. The slime grabbed the pen right out of Izuku's hands and sucked the notebook into its goo, spitting it back out on the floor. The slime clicked the pen a few times before sloppily writing in its page with the vocabulary of Midoriya and the writing skill of a 5-year-old. The students simply watched as it hummed a warped tune. Soon, it gave the notebook back to its owner, the other kids crowding them both.

"Bro, what did it say?" Kaminari asked.

“Can you even read it?” Uraraka squinted at the nearly illegible pages.

"It says that it came here because it sensed people being upset or hurt and came here to check it out," Midoriya said with a few pauses to read the writing before raising an eyebrow at Kaminari. "Kaminari, are you doing alright?"

"I'm fine! Yeah, I've been upset recently, but it's nothing I can't handle!" Kaminari said as he looked up at the slime. "Is that all you do? Just go around and find sad people and try to make them feel better?"

The slime nodded enthusiastically, its hands (nubs?) making their way towards the notebook again, Izuku giving it back to them quickly.

"Then why did you disappear last night? And did you leave that blanket?" Denki asked, the slime writing quickly to answer him.

"And are there others with your quirk? Or are you something else entirely?" Midoriya asked.

“And how did you get past UA security?” Sero asked.

It took about five minutes for the slime to finish writing, handing it back to Izuku for him to read.

"It says that Mr. Aizawa scared it away and left it's favorite blanket behind. It's not a quirk, but it doesn't know what it is exactly." Midoriya paused at the last answer. "There are others out there, but not like me. And it didn’t know this place had security, it just slid over the ground until it found the dorms."

"How did you _not_ know that UA had-" Kaminari exclaimed before covering his mouth. "Sorry, sorry for yelling. Do you want your blanket back, buddy?"

The slime nodded with hopeful eyes.

"Denki, we don't have the blanket, Mr. Aizawa does," Sero explained with a yawn. "How on earth are we supposed to get it back?"

The slime whimpered at the thought of its blanket being gone forever, its large black eyes beginning to water. Uraraka rushed to pat its head, the slime hugging her, the small girl tried not to cringe as she felt a weird sensation over the skin where the two were touching.

"Hey, it's okay! We'll get your blanket back, little guy!" She said, grinning as if she was about to laugh.

"This isn't that funny, Ocha," Izuku raised an eyebrow.

"I know!" She said as she pulled away from the slime, a few giggles forcing their way out of her. "That was him doing that!"

"So, is that what you do? You just make people laugh or somethin'?" Shinsou asked, the slime nodding as it made its way over to him, most likely to demonstrate how it did so. "No thank you, I'd rather not be laughing up a storm at 2 in the morning."

It frowned as it morphed itself from its toddler-sized pile of slime into a sad little puddle of slime beside Shinsou, making them all chuckle.

"Toshi, you made him sad!" Uraraka scolded. “Apologize!”

"Oh, this is amazing," Kaminari snickered as he took a picture of the slime and Shinsou, who simply rolled his eyes and flipped him the bird.

“I’m sorry, alright?” Shinsou patted the pile, the slime gurgling as it rose to about half its height. “You got a name? We can’t call you ‘him’ forever.”

The slime blinked at Shinsou before shaking its head.

“Alright, everyone, it’s time to come up with a name for our new buddy here,” Kaminari grinned as he sat down on a pillow, the slime inching over to him. “Any ideas?”

“Cuddles!”

"Maybe Peanut?"

“ _Nut_.”

“Sero, _no_.”

“Orange slime.”

“Squishy?”

“Ooh, I think I like that name,” Kaminari said, petting the slime's head. “Squishy sounds cute, what do you think, little guy?”

He cooed happily at the name, making the group grin and 'aww' at their new friend.

“Squishy it is! Great job, Shinsou!” Kaminari raised his hand towards his friend, the former blushing as he high-fived Denki.

“I’m getting the feeling that you’ve been wanting to use that name somewhere,” Uraraka said.

“Hush, focus on the slime,” Shinsou pointed at the sli-Squishy, who was nearly vibrating with the positive attention he was getting.

"Well, guys," Kaminari started with a yawn, looking at the clock with happy, but tired eyes. "It looks like Operation: Peanut Butter was a success. Now let's get some sleep, Aizawa's gonna work me and Toshi like dogs after detention."

" _Ugh_ ," Shinsou groaned as he rubbed his temple, laying back down on his pillow. "Don't remind me. Goodnight, everybody."

"Night."

"Goodnight, guys."

"G'night."

"Night."

" _Wroo!!_ "


	4. New Member

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Today I offer you a new member to the Cryptid Hunters. Tomorrow? Who knows? I sure don't.  
> -  
> Class 1-A  
> -  
> Midoriya- Bone Machine Broke  
> Uraraka- Space Girl  
> Tsuyu- Ribbit  
> Bakugou- Lord Explosion Murder  
> Kirishima- Hard 24/7  
> Iida- Sanic  
> Kaminari- Pikachu  
> Sero- Spiderman  
> Mina- On Wednesdays we wear pink  
> Jiro- Beats by Dre  
> Todoroki- Katy Perry  
> Hagakure- John Cena  
> Tokoyami- Revelry in the Dark  
> Momo- Mom  
> Yuga- And I shine like gloss  
> Ojiro- Tails  
> Koji- Snow White  
> Sato- Mary Berry  
> Shoji- Limbs  
> Shinsou- Insert sleeping noises here  
> Aizawa- Dadzawa  
> -  
> Cryptid Hunters  
> -  
> Midoriya- Commander  
> Shinsou- Cover Up  
> Kaminari- Recorder  
> Sero- Rescue  
> Uraraka- 2nd in Command  
> ????????- ??????

**_Cryptid Hunters 7:47 AM_ **

**Recorder** : hey most of you are in the kitchen yeah?

 **Recorder** : can someone bring smth for squishy to eat?

**Cover Up** : 3 of us are in class

 **Cover Up** : come get him something yourself

**Rescue** : I’ll bring him some food.

**Recorder** : this is why you’re my bff hanta

 **Recorde** r: he’s writing on my wall.

**2nd in Command** : then stop him?????

**Recorder** : squishy said he only eats candy, but if he can’t get any then he’ll eat anything other than meat.

 **Recorder** : or soda. It makes him sick.

**Rescue** : I’m bringing a few of those huge m&m bags from the candy box and water

 **Rescue** : and then we have to leave

**2nd in Command** : is he just staying in your room all day kaminari??

**Rescue** : open up

 **Rescue** : my hands are full

**Recorder** : i mean, the balcony door’s unlocked if he wants to leave. I’m not keeping him or anything.

**Rescue** : why,,,,, why does he eat like that???

**Recorder** : its so freaky but i can’t stop looking

**Rescue** : I can. We have class.

 **Rescue** : omg

***Rescue sent a picture!*** _[Kaminari has his hand on the doorknob and is looking down at Squishy, who is hugging his leg and seems close to tears.]_

**2nd in Command** : I just saved that pic and SQUISHY’S SO CUTE I’M GONNA CRY-

**Rescue** : Denki _is_ crying. I’m also typing this as I’m dragging him through the halls.

**Recorder** : AKSJDKLAJDLA IM LOVE HIM SO MUCH

 **Recorder** : HE IS NOW MY CHILD

 **Recorder** : MY BABY BOY WHO I LOVE WITH ALL OF MY HEART

 **Recorder** : AND YOU ARE ALL THE FATHERS

**Cover Up** : I’m NOt kEePIng hIM Or aNyThinG-

 **Cover Up** : It hasn’t even been a full day yet.

**Recorder** : SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP

**2nd in Command** : I’ve always wanted to be a dad.

 **2nd in Command** : Deku said that he’s always wanted a dad oop-

**Cover Up** : Where’s his phone? And also isn’t all might his dad-

**2nd in Command** : He’s right next to iida so he doesn’t really wanna open the chat with him around. and despite popular belief, all might isn’t his dad! His actual dad is ”””working abroad”””

**Cover Up** : ah. Sorry mido

**Rescue** : that’s rough, buddy.

**Recorder** : it’s okay midoriya we’re gonna get you a dad.

**Cover Up** : I’ll ask my dad. I’ve always wanted a younger brother.

**Commander** : guys its fone

 **Commander** : fine*

 **Commander** : moms fine too

 **Commander** : we don’t need anybody else

**Cover Up** : Smells like mommas boy in here

***Commander is offline!***

**Cover Up** : midoriya you know I didn’t mean it like that.

**2nd in Command** : APOLOGIZE RIGHT TF NOW BEFORE I KILL YOU

**Rescue** : Apologize later, Mr Aizawa’s coming.

**2nd in Command** : I will murder you in training today.

***2nd in Command is offline!***

***Rescue is offline!***

***Recorder is offline!***

***Cover Up is offline!***

**\---**

**_Class 1-A 5:52 PM_ **

**Class Mom** : It has been almost 3 hours.

**Beats by Dre** : Almost 3 hours of peace and quiet. This is truly a once-in-a-lifetime experience. And this is going on for a week? God bless.

**On wednesdays we wear pink** : 3 hours of extra training with aizawa along with the beating they got by ura and mido during training??? I’d have BEEN passed out.

**Spiderman** : ok but watching them get beat up by the class cuties was funny asf

**Hard 24/7** : ^^^

**Mary Berry** : ^^^

**Katy Perry** : ^^^

**John Cena** : ^^^

 **John Cena:** oh wow mr aizawa’s really letting kami and shinsou have it jesus christ

**Sanic** : As he should! Waking a teacher up at 2 in the morning saying that a villain is trying to attack you and another classmate isn’t a joke and shouldn’t be taken lightly! I personally have no sympathy for either of them and neither should any of you!

**Tails** : ^^^

**Ribbit** : ^^^

**Limbs** : ^^^

**Lord Explosion Murder** : This is the only time i’m agreeing with glasses

**Class Mom** : ^^^

**Hard 24/7** : I have sympathy. They look super upset about it.

**Ribbit** : Who would be happy training with Mr. Aizawa for three hours straight, kero?

**Hard 24/7** : That’s not what I meant. They seem like something’s really on their mind and mr aizawa’s just making it worse by keeping them there.

 **Hard 24/7** : I think I’m taking back what I said yesterday. Maybe something really was out there?

**Space Girl** : Oh?

**Lord Explosion Murder** : Shut up and stop thinking so damn hard, you’re gonna fry your brain like dunceface.

 **Lord Explosion Murder** : They’re just pissy because they couldn’t get away with it.

**Hard 24/7** : idk man.

**Space Girl** : _@Bone Machine Broke @Spiderman_ HE IS ONE OF US

**Bone Machine Broke** : ONE OF US

**Spiderman** : ONE OF US

**Space Girl** : ONE OF US

**Hard 24/7** : I’m scared.

**Bone Machine Broke** : O N E O F U S

**Spiderman** : TAKE HIM TO THE CULT COMMANDER

**Hard 24/7** : I’m begging you to tell me what’s going on

\---

_**Cryptid Hunters 5:59 PM** _

***Commander has added Kirishima Eijirou to Cryptid Hunters.***

**Commander** : Hey kirishima, as Commander Midoriya, I welcome you to the Cryptid Hunters.

**Kirishima Eijirou** : wtf is this?

**2nd in Command** : We’ll tell you only if you promise not to tell anyone else. Nothing bad happened, I promise. It’s Uraraka btw.

**Kirishima Eijirou** : Okay??

**Commander** : So the day we all got wind of Kaminari and hitoshi saying that something was out around the dorms, you remember how sero, ocha, and I were the only ones who believed them?

**Kirishima Eijirou** : Yeah.

**Commander** : So that night we had a stakeout in kaminari's room and we found it.

**Kirishima Eijirou** : WHAT?!

**2nd in Command** : His name is Squishy and he is our child. This chat is also used to show how much we adore our new son.

**Rescue** : and also Denki gave us these wack names as if we were actually gonna go out and do smth.

 **Rescue** : I guess you’ll get one when he’s able to function.

 **Rescue** : and it’s sero. Recorder is Denki and Cover Up is Shinsou.

***2nd in Command sent a picture!*** _[It’s a selfie with Uraraka sitting next to Midoriya and Squishy while Sero is playing on Kaminari’s switch in the background. Midoriya is laying down on his stomach writing in his notebook while Squishy is playing on his phone next to him.]_

**Kirishima Eijirou** : WHAT IS THAT???

**2nd in Command** : This is our son. Deku has a notebook about him and the 3 of us are in Kami’s room rn if you wanna come see him. He'll be happy to see a new face!!

 **2nd in Command** : But he’s a secret, don’t let anybody know he’s here.

**Commander** : PLEASE don’t let anybody know he’s here. Or if he somehow gets noticed by somebody, we HAVE to make sure Iida, Kacchan, Tsu, or Yaomomo don’t know about him. If they see him it’s game over.

**2nd in Command** : GOD don’t let iida find him. We at least have a slight chance to get the others off our backs. I love iida to death but dear lord,,,,,

**Kirishima Eijirou** : Ofc I won't tell a soul!! I’m omw.


	5. "Here you-OH MY GOD!!!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OOF I was wondering when I'd get burnout from writing, and sure enough, I dropped out the second I published the last chapter!! I'll be back on track soon, so take this while I figure out how these next few chapters are gonna play out. And also did y'all see what I did there with the Cryptid Hunters and the people who they have to keep Squishy a secret from?

“Oh _wow_ ,” Kirishima murmured to himself as Sero let him in Denki’s room. “It’s bigger than in the picture.”

Squishy noticed Kirishima and cooed happily as he hurried over to him. Kirishima backed away, pressed against the door as he looked down at the pile of slime.

“Let him hug your leg, he’s not gonna hurt you,” Sero said, petting Squishy’s head. “You’ll feel a lot better, trust me.”

Kirishima still seemed uneasy, but he slowly walked up to let the slime hug his leg.

“Ohoho my god!” Kirishima exclaimed as a toothy grin spread across his face and-wait, was that caramel he was smelling?

“Feels nice, huh?” Sero smirked at him. “Come on and sit down. I think we still have a bit until Denki comes back. Shinsou’s probably gonna come with him, I think.”

Kirishima’s smile slowly faded as the slime went back to Midoriya’s phone. He sat criss-cross on the other side of his friend.

“You guys said his name’s Squishy?” Kirishima asked. “Who came up with that one?”

“Hitoshi did!” Uraraka said. “If you wanna know any of the nerd stuff you’ve got your guy right there with his nose in his notebook.”

“Right,” The redhead nodded as he looked down at Midoriya. “So, how does he do the happy thing?”

“Hm?”

“When he touches you and you feel happy, how does that work?”

“Oh, uh, I’m not entirely sure myself,” The smaller boy rubbed the back of his neck as he sat up. “All I’ve got on it is that physical contact with him immediately gives you a mild sense of euphoria, but I don’t really know how. The longer you’re in contact, the longer the feeling will last after contact has stopped.”

“Hm.” He hummed once he processed the information. “That’s cool.”

“Also, I’m not sure if you noticed, but Squishy gives off a smell that differs from whoever he’s touching, most likely that person’s favorite smell. So far we’ve got chocolate, strawberry mochi, lavender, cinnamon rolls, and roses,” Midoriya listed off before looking up at Kirishima. “What did you smell?”

“Caramel,” Kirishima chuckled. “All I’m hearing is that we all just have a huge sweet tooth.”

“Yeah,” Midoriya grinned before the door slammed open, Squishy hiding behind the two boys before realizing that it was Shinsou and Kaminari.

“God, you two look _exhausted_ ,” Uraraka said as she went behind them. “Well, Shinsou, _you_ look exhausted. Kaminari, you look stupid. I’ll be right back.”

"Wheeyyy~" Kaminari gave a thumb's up.

“No, I'm not exhausted _at all_ ,” Shinsou’s mutter had no bite as he fell to his knees, slowly taking his shirt and shoes off as he watched the electric boy sloppily copy his actions before he saw Squishy next to Midoriya. “Hi, Squishy-”

“ _MY SON!!!_ ” Kaminari shouted as he started to stumble over towards the slime, but tripped over his feet and face-planted onto the floor, making no effort to get up. “ _HI, SON!!_ ”

“Sooo,” Shinsou ignored the scene and directed his attention towards Kirishima. “He’s with us now, too?”

“Please help me, they kidnapped me and then asked what my favorite smell was,” Kirishima said.

“Ah,” Shinsou noticed the stare he was receiving. “You like what you see, Sero?”

“You know I do,” Sero winked before the playfully flirty look turned into one of concern. “I was just looking at those _bruises_ , my guy. You sure you don’t need Recovery Girl or somethin’?”

“I’m fine, I just bruise easy,” Shinsou shrugged before walking over to Squishy and sitting down. “Hey, Squish. Hope you didn’t miss us too much.”

“Wroo!” Squishy cooed before nuzzling Shinsou’s face.

“Oh my _god_ ,” Shinsou said as he collapsed next to Midoriya. “That shit feels _good_.”

“I sure hope it does,” Uraraka giggled as she closed the door behind them, two large water bottles and a pack of Skittles in her hands. “Drink up, you two went through a lot today-”

“I already apologized like 15 times!”

“-Kirishima, you wanna feed Squishy?” Uraraka finished, tossing the water bottles to Denki and Hitoshi, hitting the latter square in the face while the other let out a 'whey' in appreciation.

“He won’t hurt ya, we promise,” Sero said with a smirk on his face.

“Uh, sure, I guess,” The redhead took the pack of Skittles and poured some into his hand before holding it out for the slime, who was inching closer to Kirishima at the sight of candy. “Here you- _OH MY GOD_ _!!_ ”

Kirishima shrieked as Squishy took his entire hand into his mouth for a few seconds before spitting it out, the candy gone and slowly disintegrating inside the creature. He whipped his head around to glare at Sero, who was howling with laughter as he hit the floor.

“YOU SAID HE DIDN’T BITE!!”

“No I didn’t!!” Sero got out through his laughter as he gradually calmed down. “I said he wouldn’t _hurt_ you! And he didn’t, so you have no reason to be mad at me! Now go on, the little guy’s hungry, Kiri.”

Kirishima opened his mouth before closing it again, grimacing as he slowly poured more Skittles into his hand to Squishy’s delight, letting the gross cycle continue until the bag was empty, staring at the slime watching Midoriya write in his notebook at a speed only Iida could rival.

“I’m gonna go wash my hands. Preferably in bleach, if we still have any. Be right back,” Kirishima said as he stood up, the slime sliding over to the electric boy still lying face-down on the floor.

“See ya,” Uraraka waved as the door shut behind Kirishima. “Kaminari, are you doing alright?”

“I guess,” He gave a thumbs up from his spot on the floor, finally out of ‘whey’ mode. “I’m really just sore and tired. Come here, son.”

“That’s not your son,” Shinsou rolled his eyes as he watched Kaminari hug Squishy.

“You’re right,” The boy then hugged Shinsou, who choked on his spit at the contact. “Squishy’s _our_ son!”

“Absolutely not!”

“Wroooo!” The slime cooed as he looked up at the boys with wide eyes. “Wroo?”

“Aww, Shinsou, look at him!” Kaminari made puppy-dog eyes at his friend. “How could you deny him a family? You’re just like your father!”

Kirishima had just come back and quietly joined the others watching the two boys argue while the slime sat between them.

“... _Fine_ , I’ll be his ‘dad’,” Shinsou huffed, the two cheering in excitement. “And don’t compare me to Dad ever again. I’m better than him.”

“Elaborate.”

“We’re using big words today, huh?” Shinsou raised an eyebrow. “Well, I didn’t just make us go through three hours of extra training. I’m better than Dad in every way.” 

“If you two are done flirting with each other, then Deku and I would like to talk about some things regarding your new son,” Uraraka announced, the three boys behind her fighting back laughter as Kaminari and Shinsou blushed furiously.

“We weren’t flirting!” Kaminari whined. “It was for Squishy’s sake.”

“Whatever you say, Denki,” Sero said. “Anyways, what do you two wanna talk about?”

“Ah, right!” Midoriya opened his notebook and began to read from it.


	6. Todo vs Baku: FIGHT

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bakugou is ghetto+todobaku weird hate friendship bc I said so. So take this cracky filler that was inspired by a tiktok bc despite all of the love for our amazing Squishy, this is still a bnha chatfic. Next chapter we're gonna do a timeskip so be ready for that i guess.  
> -  
> Class 1-A  
> -  
> Midoriya- Bone Machine Broke  
> Bakugou- Lord Explosion Murder  
> Kirishima- Hard 24/7  
> Iida- Sanic  
> Kaminari- Pikachu  
> Mina- On wednesdays we wear pink  
> Jiro- Beats by Dre  
> Todoroki- Katy Perry  
> Momo- Class Mom

_**Class 1-A 10:39 PM** _

**Beats by Dre** : Whoever’s arguing can you PLEASE be quiet?

**Beats by Dre** : Some of us are trying to sleep.

**Sanic** : Do you have any idea on who it is so I can put a stop to it, Jirou?

**Beats by Dre** : Idk who’s all in the argument but i do hear faint explosions so that gives us a nice clue

**Pikachu** : ooh girl what they sayin?

**Beats by Dre** : Why are you so nosy?

**Beats by Dre** : And I thought you passed out the second you got to your room???

**Pikachu** : Well I didn’t, actually! I just drank water and vibed with my new bffs.

  
**On wednesdays we wear pink** : First of all WHO are you calling your new bffs???

**On wednesdays we wear pink** : Actually that’s a convo for another day.

**On wednesdays we wear pink** : Jirou what are they saying?

**On wednesdays we wear pink** : plz i need my daily dose of drama

**Sanic** : Ashido, Kaminari, this is disrespectful to the privacy of your fellow students and also very unbecoming behavior for heroes in training!

**Beats by Dre** : ok so I think it's bakugou and todoroki arguing and I hear lots of insults it’s really funny

**Beats by Dre** : HOLY SHIFGOAJSDKLA

**Pikachu** : TEA???

**On wednesdays we wear pink** : GIRL WHAT HAPPENED

**Beats by Dre** : BAKUGOU SAID ‘MAYBE THE STANK UNDER YOUR ARMS IS WHAT THEY MEANT BY ANOTHER VILLAIN ATTACK THAT WE GOTTA PREPARE FOR’ I’M G O N E

**Pikachu** : LMFAOOO WHAT

**On wednesdays we wear pink** : HE POPPED OFF-

**Class Mom** : What’s with all the notifications?

**Pikachu** : SCROLL UP

**Class Mom** : Oh. Well, in that case,

***Class Mom is offline!***

**Sanic** : Jirou, this is unheroic behavior! Stop listening in on Bakugou and Todoroki this instant!

**Beats by Dre** : OOOOOOO TODORKI SAID ‘OR MAYBE THE FOAM COMING OUT OF YOUR MOUTH LIKE A DOG WITH RABIES IS WHAT WE HAVE TO PREPARE FOR’ SKAHASDASKD

**Beats by Dre** : AND I HEAR MORE EXPLOSIONSSS

**Bone Machine Broke** : what’s going on?

**Bone Machine Broke** : oh

**Bone Machine Broke** : oh yeah a dog with rabies is one of the best ways to describe kacchan tbh

**Pikachu** : MIDORIYA JASDKAS

**Hard 24/7** : I’m screenshotting all of this for later

**Pikachu** : SEND THEM ALL TO ME

**Beats by Dre** : IM YELLINGGG

**Lord Explosion Murder** : I’LL KILL YOU DEKU

**Lord Explosion Murder** : JUST YOU WAIT I’M GONNA BLOW YOU UP SO BAD THAT EVEN THE GRANDMA WON’T BE ABLE TO KISS YOU BETTER

**Katy Perry** : Do you think she could kiss those rough ass edges of yours better?

**Pikachu** : OOOOOHHHH TODOROKI JUST INSULTED YOUR HAIR YOU GONNA TAKE THAT BAKUBRO

**On wednesdays we wear pink** : LIGHT HIM UP TODOROKI

**Katy Perry** : You old crusty tortilla.

**Lord Explosion Murder** : COULD SHE KISS THOSE TOENAILS BETTER

**Lord Explosion Murder** : THEM CLAWS MAKING YOUR TOES ON YOUR NASTY ASS FEET LOOK AT EACH OTHER LIKE

**Lord Explosion Murder** : HEYYY BIG TOE

**Lord Explosion Murder** : HEY PINKY TOE WYD

**Bone Machine Broke** : ASDFKLSKAJASL KACCHAN S T O P

**Beats by Dre** : CLAWS HE SAID CLAWS I CANTTT

**Pikachu** : I’M ACTUALLY CACKLING RN

**Pikachu** : THESE ARE ACTUAL TEARS ROLLING DOWN MY FACE

**Katy Perry** : You leave my toes out of this.

**Katy Perry** : Do you have a foot fetish or something? I’m telling Kirishima.

**Katy Perry** :  _ @Hard 24/7  _ Please it's urgent.

**On wednesdays we wear pink** : IM SCREAMING

**On wednesdays we wear pink** : DENKI JUST SHORT CIRCUITED

**Lord Explosion Murder** : YOU’RE NOT TELLING EIJIROU SHIT YOU MOLDY PEPPERMINT

**Katy Perry** : All of these nerves in the human body and you somehow get on every single one of them, you foot fetishist.

**Katy Perry** : Get off of them before I make you.

**Lord Explosion Murder** : YOU GET OFF MINE FIRST THE FUCK???

**Katy Perry** : And that’s on looking like an angry pomeranian with rabies.

**Lord Explosion Murder** : AND THATS WHY YOU SMELL LIKE A WEEK OLD DEAD FISH AND HAVE MISMATCHED SKIN LIKE ONE BITCH

**Beats by Dre** : Woah that might have been too far even for you bakugou

**Hard 24/7** : yeah that’s not very manly of you babe.

**Hard 24/7** : Maybe you two need to stop? Why are you even yelling at each other this late?

**Lord Explosion Murder** : OH SHUT UP ICYHOT STARTED IT

**Lord Explosion Murder** : OR MAYBE HIS NAME SHOULD BE ICYTHOT BY ALL THE NASTY SHIT HE SAYS BOUT THE DAMN NERD

**Lord Explosion Murder** : WANTING TO SMACK HIS ASS RAW AND OTHER WEIRD SHIT

Katy Perry: You clearly don't understand the purpose of PRIVATE messaging.

**On wednesdays we wear pink** : W H A T-

**On wednesdays we wear pink** : LMAO YOU TWO NEED TO STOP

***Lord Explosion Murder has changed Katy Perry’s name to Icythot.***

***Icythot has changed Lord Explosion Murder’s name to Foot Fetish.***

**Icythot** : The only thing that needs to be stopped is that explode-o-breath that’s kicking just like his attitude.

**Beats by Dre** : AND I OOP-

**Icythot** : What? You don’t have anything else to sayalkdghs

On wednesdays we wear pink: OH MY GOD HE KILLED HIM-

**Beats by Dre** : I WISH Bakugou got to him but NO it was the CLASS KILLJOY smfh

**On wednesdays we wear pink** :  _ @Sanic _ WHYYYY

**Sanic** : Because it is extremely rude to be so disrespectful and argue this late at night or at any other time! And all of your responses to this whole thing are telling behavior on what your priorities are as students and as friends!

**Sanic** : Now everyone go to sleep!

**On wednesdays we wear pink** : Ugh fiiiiine!

***Everyone is offline!***

**\---**

**Kirishima Eijirou - > Todoroki Shouto**

**Kirishima Eijirou** : Fyi, you’re not too far off with the foot thing. He has more of a 'whole lower body' thing if you get what I mean??? Don’t tell him I told you.

**Todoroki Shouto** : I won’t. I’ll admit I didn’t really take him for an ass guy, though.

**Kirishima Eijirou** : Aldsjksda you couldn’t be any more w r o n g-

**Kirishima Eijirou** : And also, who was the nerd katsuki was talking about???

**Todoroki Shouto** : Goodnight, Kirishima.

**Kirishima Eijirou** : lmao goodnight


	7. All Aboard the Fluff Train (Part 1)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So we're time skipping all the way to the end of the first day of internships! And also look me in the eyes and tell me that Deku isn't the biggest slut for chocolate. That's right you can't.  
> -  
> Dekusquad  
> -  
> Midoriya- Lord of the Lies  
> Uraraka- Kirby  
> Tsuyu- Frogger  
> Iida- Dad  
> Todoroki- Prince Zuko

_**Dekusquad 4:57 PM** _

**Kirby** : Hi! How’s everyone’s internship going? Tsu and I are super excited and everyone seems really nice here! Our first patrol is supposed to start tomorrow and!!! We’re equal parts excited and scared!!!

**Dad** : My internship is going wonderfully! I’m working with some of the heroes I already knew because of my brother, so it’s almost like a reunion.

**Prince Zuko** : My internship is going fine.

**Kirby** :  _ @Lord of the Lies _ Well?

**Dad** : Midoriya must be feeling tired after his internship! It is very tiring work, after all!

**Kirby** : But this was just supposed to be going to the agencies and getting hired! Wtf could have happened???

**Prince** **Zuko** : Maybe he’s just busy.

**Frogger** : You know he's a trouble magnet, kero.

**Kirby** : Why are you texting we're literally a foot apart?

Midoriya had been staring at the messages for the past fifteen minutes as he rode with Mirio on the bus back to school. What should he say? He was happy that Sir had hired him, but the whole ordeal from the second he saw him with Bubble Girl in that  _ thing  _ up to when he finally accepted him left a bitter taste in his mouth. Nighteye hired him just to make him quit and give up One for All, for god's sake! Finally, he typed a message into his phone.

**Lord of the Lies** : I’m definitely not happy, but I’m fine I guess. I got hired in the end.

**Kirby** : What happened???

**Dad** : Are you alright?

**Lord of the Lies** : I’m not sure how much I can tell you, but basically he just hates my guts.

**Kirby** : Vent here or back in your room? The rest of us are either walking back to school or are already there.

**Lord of the Lies** : I’ll vent here if that’s fine with you guys. I’m still a long way from school.

**Prince Zuko** : Of course, this is about you. Do whatever you’re comfortable with.

**Lord of the Lies** : Alright. So he thinks that I’m not fit to be a hero or whatever. He made me fight him to change his mind about hiring me.

**Lord of the Lies** : A fight that I lost, btw. He used his quirk on me beforehand and I didn’t know, so he predicted all of my moves and dodged them.

**Lord of the Lies** : He hired me just to push me hard enough that I quit interning with him.

**Lord of the Lies** : So I’m gonna prove him wrong and be the best intern he's ever had.

**Kirby** : ofc you would do that. But shouldn’t we tell Aizawa about this?

**Dad** : Right, you shouldn’t be interning under somebody who doesn't like you and wants to work you until you quit!

**Lord of the Lies** : No! It’s fine, really. I doubt he’ll do anything too bad, but he’ll just push me harder than I thought he would!

**Frogger** : Is there anything you want right now, kero?

**Lord of the Lies** : I don’t need anything, but thank you, Tsu.

**Frogger** : I didn’t ask you what you needed, I asked you what you wanted, kero. We’re near that corner store about half a mile away from the school. It’s not much to help right now but tell us what you want, kero.

**Lord of the Lies** : No! I don’t want you two wasting any of your money on me! It’s fine, I promise.

**Prince Zuko** : Endeavor’s almost a billionaire.

**Dad** : I also have enough money to help comfort a friend if you two don't have enough money to do so!

**Lord of the Lies** : NO!

**Frogger** :  _ @Prince Zuko @Dad _ where are you two, kero?

**Prince Zuko** : I’m not that far away from you two, I think.

**Dad** : And I am back at the dorms.

**Lord of the Lies** : Guys you don't have to get me anything.

**Lord of the Lies** : It’s fine, really.

**Frogger** : What’s your favorite candy, kero?

**Lord of the Lies** : I don’t have one.

**Prince Zuko** : Liar.

**Prince Zuko** : He’s a HUGE chocolate fanatic. Also turn around I’m just a bit behind you.

**Deku** : Mind your own business.

**Frogger** : The bad mood’s worse than we thought if you’re snapping at Shouto, kero.

**Kirby** : So it’s been decided!  _ @Everyone _ We’re having a squad sleepover that doubles as Deku Appreciation Hours!!! Shouto is busy buying almost every chocolate bar in the store and that chocolate drink that you really like!

**Lord of the Lies** : No, we’re not having a sleepover.

**Dad** : I can set up everything in either your room or the common area, Midoriya.

**Lord of the Lies** : Tenya, please.

**Kirby** : You’re always there for us whenever we’re down in the dumps. It’s time we return the favor. Please just let us pamper and spoil you.

**Kirby** : Just this once?

The boy sighed as he pinched the bridge of his nose. Mirio turned to him.

“What’s up? Sir didn’t rough you up too badly, did he?” He asked. "Maybe Bubble Girl really did set him off earlier. He's not usually in that bad of a mood, I guess we just caught him on a bad day."

“No,” Midoriya shook his head. “I was texting my friends about our internships, and they’ve decided that we’re having a sleepover that doubles as ‘Deku Appreciation Hours’.”

“Sounds fun!” Mirio then read the screen before putting a hand on Midoriya’s shoulder. “You have good friends, man. They just want to help.”

“I know,” The annoyance soon turned to fondness as a small smile appeared on his face. “They’re amazing.”

**Lord of the Lies** : My room, please.

**Kirby** : YES!

**Prince Zuko** : Mission accomplished.

**Dad:** We appreciate you letting us do this for you, Midoriya!

**Lord of the Lies** : And I really appreciate you guys for doing this or me. You’re all my best friends.

**Kirby** : AND YOU’RE OUR BEST FRIEND TOO!!!

**Frogger** : She’s about to cry, kero.

**Lord of the Lies** : I’ll be at the dorms soon enough. You guys mind telling me what’s gonna happen at this sleepover or will it be a surprise?

**Kirby** : Deku Appreciation Hours will be full of chocolate, memes, Disney movies, lots of pillows and blankets, cuddling, tickle fights, pillow fights, actual fights-

**Dad** : There will be no actual fighting.

**Kirby** : We’ll have it all!!

**Lord of the Lies** : Sounds like fun. Can’t wait to beat your head in with a pillow.

**Kirby** : I will destroy you.

**Lord of the Lies** : Pull tf up then I’ll be at the dorms in a bit.

**Kirby** : Shouto will be the referee.

**Prince Zuko** : I will?

**Kirby** : There will be blood.

**Lord of the Lies** : Wigs will be snatched.

**Kirby** : The concession stand will be serving WEAVE.

**Lord of the Lies** : It's on sight when I get off the bus and that’s on period.

**Kirby** : PERIODT.

**Uravity - > Deku**

**Uravity** : Do you need to see Squishy? He's in Shinsou's room today and he'll be in mine tomorrow.

**Deku** : Nah, too risky. Thanks though.

**Uravity** : You sure you don't need just a small dose?

**Deku** : Will you please stop talking about Squishy like you're a drug dealer?

**Uravity** : Absolutely not.

**Uravity** : Now hurry up so I can kill you with a pillow.

**Deku** : I just got on campus.


	8. All Aboard the Fluff Train (Part 2)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Every hour that passes is one hour closer to band camp and all of my bones are aching in anticipation. If I suddenly go MIA for more than a few days then there's your explanation why. Anyhoo this chapter is just a tiny bit shorter than I would've liked but you get what you get and you'll like it. This chapter also wasn't supposed to involve the CH at all but it is what it is.  
> -  
> Cryptid Hunters  
> -  
> Midoriya- Commander  
> Uraraka- 2nd in Command  
> Kaminari- Recorder  
> Sero- Rescue  
> Shinsou- Cover Up  
> Kirishima- Defense

Iida was currently walking through the dorms as he lectured the two teens in his arms giggling their heads off while pleading for the tallest to let them go, ignoring the weird and funny looks they got from their wandering classmates.

“Tenya, come on!” Midoriya whined through his laughter. “We’ll stop trying to fight each other.”

“We’ll be good, we promise!” Uraraka said in her usual bubbly tone. “Put us down!”

“Absolutely not,” Iida shook his head, but even he couldn’t stop the growing smile on his face. “You two have proven to me that you cannot be trusted to not try and fight each other when I let you go. I’ll let you go when we reach Midoriya’s room.”

“Are Tsu and Shouto already there?” Uraraka asked, noticing the slight blush that dusted her friend’s cheeks.

“Yes, Tsu and Todoroki are already in Midorya’s room setting everything up for the perfect sleepover!” Iida exclaimed as they reached Midoriya’s floor, sending an uncharacteristic smirk his way. “And I’m sure you’re _very_ happy that Todoroki’s in your room, yes?”

Uraraka burst into laughter as Midoriya’s face turned as red as a tomato.

“Put me down!” He shrieked, elbowing Iida in the ribs. “How do you even know about that?!”

“I’m not as oblivious as you think I am,” Iida let them both drop to the floor with a loud thud. “And Uraraka told me.”

“You little-” Midoriya was about to lunge at her when the door opened, Tsu letting out a ribbit as she observed the situation. “Hey, Tsu!”

“Hey,” She replied. “Ochaco, what did you do, kero?”

“I did nothing!” She exclaimed as she ran inside and hid behind her girlfriend.

“Hello, Midoriya,” Todoroki waved from Midoriya’s bed, which was a mess of pillows and blankets that had mostly tumbled from the bed and piled onto the floor.

“Hi, Shouto,” He glared at the girls giggling behind him. 

“Alright, guys, let’s get this sleepover started!” Uraraka said as she hurried over to Todoroki and grabbed a grocery bag. “Starting with some chocolate and The Princess and the Frog! Here you go!”

“Thanks,” Midoriya opened the bar of chocolate as he sat down next to Todoroki. “You’ve watched that movie, right?”

“I can’t say that I have,” He shook his head. “What’s it about?”

The other four looked at each other before looking up at Todoroki with the biggest smiles on their faces.

“What’s with those looks? You’re creeping me out.”

“Oh, this is gonna be the _best sleepover ever_ ,” Midoriya’s grin got even bigger. “Get ready to be introduced to a whole new world, Shouto.”

\---

**_Cryptid Hunters 11:39 PM_ **

**Cover Up** : HEY UH HAVE ANY OF YOU SEEN SQUISHY?

**Rescue** : Wdym??? he’s??? in your room???

**Cover Up** : YEAH HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE IN MY ROOM

**Defense** : Shinsou do not tell me you lost Squishy I stg it's too late for this.

**Cover Up** : I LEFT TO USE THE BATHROOM AND HE WAS GONE WHEN I CAME BACK

**Recorder** : SHINSOU HITOSHI YOU LOST OUR SON???

**Rescue** : SHINSOU OH MY GOD

**Cover Up** : IM SORRY

**Cover Up** : I,M SO SORRY

**Recorder** : CHAIR BUT MAKE IT ELECTRIC

**Cover Up** : OKOKOK BEFORE YOU SEND 10000 VOLTS UP MY ASS I FOUND A NOTE

**Cover Up** : HES LOOKING FOR DAD TO MAKE HIM GIVE HIM HIS BLANKET BACK ADALSKSADF

**Defense** : WHERE ARE OUR LEADERS

**Cover Up** : THEYRE BUSY

**Cover Up** : THEY WERE HAVING A SLEEPOVER BC APPARENTLY MIDO HAD A REALLY CRAPPY DAY AT HIS AGENCY SO WE DON'T GET THE PRIVILEGE OF BRAINCELLS TONIGHT

**Cover Up** : ITS ALL UP TO US

**Recorder** : WTF ARE WE GONNA DO

**Cover Up** : OKAY I HAVE A PLAN

**Cover Up** : KIRISHIMA AND SERO GO AND FIND SQUISHY WHILE DENKI AND I BREAK INTO DAD AND POPS’ TO TRY AND FIND THE BLANKET

**Cover Up** : I’LL TEXT YOU WHEN I FIND IT AND KIRI KNOWS WHERE MY BEDROOM WINDOW IS

**Rescue** : WERE LOOKING AS QUIETLY AS WE CAN AS WE SPEAK

**Defense** : DO YOU NOT HAVE THE KEY TO YOUR OWN HOME WHY DO YOU HAVE TO BREAK IN?

**Cover Up** : I HAVE A KEY BUT ITS VERY NOISY OPENING THE DOOR AND POPS IS GONNA SCOLD ME LIKE I'M 5 IF HE SEES ME AWAKE THIS LATE

**Cover Up** : ANYWAYS I’LL TEXT AGAIN WHEN WE FIND IT

***Cover Up is offline!***

***Everyone is offline!***

“I sense a great disturbance in the universe,” Uraraka suddenly whispered as the end credits rolled for their 5th movie that night. “Where’s your phone, Deku?”

“On the charger,” He replied with an eyebrow raised. “Can you get it for me?”

“I think so,” She stretched her arm behind her head and was just barely able to grab her friend’s phone, skimming over the notifications before giving it to him. “Oh, the group chat's going wild."

“What is it?” He asked as he unlocked his phone to see the barrage of messages. “Oh no.”

“Hmm?”

“Squishy’s on the loose looking for his blanket,” He answered, and Uraraka’s face paled. “It’s fine, mostly everybody’s asleep by now! They should be fine as long as Mr. Aizawa doesn’t see anything since he’s probably the only person awake this late at night.”

“...You’re gonna make us go help, aren’t you?”

“You know me too well, let’s go.”


End file.
